Ever since getting married and especially since I had my daughter, I've realized that friendships change and hell, I really don't have any. Which is ok in a way, I mean, when do I have time to hang out anyway? I'm lucky in that while I can never give "hang out time" to people, I still have people who aren't family that still love me and are there when I need them.
But it's been a long time since a friend hurt my feelings. It sounds so juvenile, but there's really no way to say it. And it stung. My heart hurt.
The thing about this happening when you're an adult is that unlike when you're a child or teen, it makes you really look at the person. The person was not who I thought they were. I looked up to them, I wished I was more like them, I was proud of how genuinely "good" they were. Now I feel like I didn't know them at all. That's a hurt in and of itself. My heart hurts.
Now, on the upside. The other thing I learned after having my daughter is that while it hurts, I'll be fine and my energies will once again be focused on her and I'll lose a piece of the hurt every day as I go about my life.
Funny how the problems we have as kids are really not that different than they are now that we are adults.
The Perils of Pegboarding
4 years ago